I just got home from Meijers...grocery shopping. I'm still laughing! This young man helped me out, putting the groceries in my car.
Neither my driver side nor passenger side doors will open from the outside. I asked him to reach in from the back to open my door. When he did, his pants slipped down...below his cheeks! Even though he was wearing long johns (Thank God) I could still the shape and pink of his derriere. Then...OHMY GOSH... he stood up and turned around...and his pants fell below his knees! All I could think of was...Pants on the Ground....and said it out loud. As he pulled up his pants he said...guess that's my theme song now....and he started singing it.....saying ...looking like a fool with my pants on the ground. I was laughing so hard I was crying. When I got into the car, I pulled out my cell phone. He, still laughing as well, said ...are you calling the newspaper??
That set me off even more. I sat there and watched him bop back towards the store...still singing Pants on the Ground.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Thursday, January 21, 2010
A LITTLE ABOUT NOTHING
I just read my daughter-in-law's blog about her adventure/misadventure with coloring her hair and while I was laughing, I couldn't help but recall all the misadventures I've had over the years.
The first time I colored my hair, I was about 23 and my hair stylist talked me into going darker. My hair was naturally ashy brown...fine and fly-away that could only be tamed by lots of teasing and hair-spray. When she finished, it was a medium brown. Not too different from my own hair in color...but ohhhh, the texture! The dye had tamed my untamable hair! I could put it back in my ususal style, a french twist, and it would stay all day with just a bare whfffff of spray. And nobody noticed. So, the the next time, a few months later, I went darker. This time a beautiful, rich mahogany color. And everybody noticed.
A few months later, my cousin with whom the kids and I shared a house, came home with a bottle of Clairol. She wanted her auburn hair the same shade as mine. So, we did it. And since there was some mixture left over, we put it on my hair. OHHHHHH big mistake! First, I did Avanelle's hair in rollers and put the dryer on her head while I rolled mine. When it was my turn for the dryer, Avanelle sat on the floor in front of me while I combed and styled her hair. It was beautiful! The dark brown brought out the auburn tint even more. I could hardly wait to see mine! When my hair was dry, Avanelle styled it and kept saying things like...you look so good with dark hair...dark hair makes your complexion look so creamy....I was on pins and needles waiting to go to the bathroom mirror to see it for myself. And I'm sure they heard my scream all the way to Ann Arbor! It wasn't the gorgeous dark auburn of Avanelle's...but BLACK!
With my pale skin, I looked like a dead person! The bad thing was, I had to live with it. Back then...I don't know about today...we had to wait several months between colorings because the chemicals could seriously damage your hair. So, what I did for the next three months was use Avanelles make-up. It was much darker and redder than what I had been using...and I had to cover everything with the base...face and throat.
I managed to wait three months...instead of the recommended six..and had my hair stylist redo the color...against her better judgement, I might add. The best I can say about that is it's a good thing it was March. People thought I had dyed my hair green on purpose! At my next hair appointment, Janine, the stylist said she had a gift for me and gave me a gorgeous brown wig! For six months whenever I left the house, that wig was on my head!
When the six months waiting period was up, my girlfriend Carol, offered to do my hair. She had trained as a hair-stylist but after working a few months in a salon, decided she didn't like the job after all. Anyway, she bought a light brown/ash blonde color kit and proceeded to do my hair.
That was how I became a blonde for over 20 years! Evidently, she left it processing too long...and my hair came out a lovely strawberry blonde and I loved it! With my coloring, it was not only looked very natural but enhanced my coloring. Who knew that I was really born a blonde..with light brown hair.
The first time I colored my hair, I was about 23 and my hair stylist talked me into going darker. My hair was naturally ashy brown...fine and fly-away that could only be tamed by lots of teasing and hair-spray. When she finished, it was a medium brown. Not too different from my own hair in color...but ohhhh, the texture! The dye had tamed my untamable hair! I could put it back in my ususal style, a french twist, and it would stay all day with just a bare whfffff of spray. And nobody noticed. So, the the next time, a few months later, I went darker. This time a beautiful, rich mahogany color. And everybody noticed.
A few months later, my cousin with whom the kids and I shared a house, came home with a bottle of Clairol. She wanted her auburn hair the same shade as mine. So, we did it. And since there was some mixture left over, we put it on my hair. OHHHHHH big mistake! First, I did Avanelle's hair in rollers and put the dryer on her head while I rolled mine. When it was my turn for the dryer, Avanelle sat on the floor in front of me while I combed and styled her hair. It was beautiful! The dark brown brought out the auburn tint even more. I could hardly wait to see mine! When my hair was dry, Avanelle styled it and kept saying things like...you look so good with dark hair...dark hair makes your complexion look so creamy....I was on pins and needles waiting to go to the bathroom mirror to see it for myself. And I'm sure they heard my scream all the way to Ann Arbor! It wasn't the gorgeous dark auburn of Avanelle's...but BLACK!
With my pale skin, I looked like a dead person! The bad thing was, I had to live with it. Back then...I don't know about today...we had to wait several months between colorings because the chemicals could seriously damage your hair. So, what I did for the next three months was use Avanelles make-up. It was much darker and redder than what I had been using...and I had to cover everything with the base...face and throat.
I managed to wait three months...instead of the recommended six..and had my hair stylist redo the color...against her better judgement, I might add. The best I can say about that is it's a good thing it was March. People thought I had dyed my hair green on purpose! At my next hair appointment, Janine, the stylist said she had a gift for me and gave me a gorgeous brown wig! For six months whenever I left the house, that wig was on my head!
When the six months waiting period was up, my girlfriend Carol, offered to do my hair. She had trained as a hair-stylist but after working a few months in a salon, decided she didn't like the job after all. Anyway, she bought a light brown/ash blonde color kit and proceeded to do my hair.
That was how I became a blonde for over 20 years! Evidently, she left it processing too long...and my hair came out a lovely strawberry blonde and I loved it! With my coloring, it was not only looked very natural but enhanced my coloring. Who knew that I was really born a blonde..with light brown hair.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS
Now that we are well into the new year, I can write about why I, long ago, resolved never to make New Years Resolutions. For one thing, I never carried them out. I had this need, I guess it was, to go for the toughies. Oh no, my resolutions were not to stop smoking or to lose weight. Each year I would resolve to stop losing my temper...to stop worrying about whether someone liked me or not...to stop feeling intimidated or inferior, to laugh more, worry less.
Needless to say, at least one...sometimes all of them...were broken before the end of January. One year, to that list, I added the resolution to read the entire bible again. I say "again" because I had read it through at least twice by the time I was out of high school. I made a plan...to read a chapter every day. I didn't follow that plan, though, often reading several chapters at a sitting. And, by the end of May, I had completed the task. And, was I proud! I told everybody who would listen. I had finally carried out a New Year's Resolution.
The hard ones kept eluding me. The temper was, I thought, the easiest one. But...I forgot to add pouting to the list. So, instead of flaring up and speaking my mind, I became a world-class pouter. The only thing I can say in my defense is...if whoever I was mad at left me alone for awhile...and let me pout...I soon got over it. It has never been part of my make-up to stay mad for very long or to carry a grudge. Once I was over it, it was as ...and is...as if it never happened. I have never been able to understand those people who can keep a grudge...and a mad...going for months, even years.
And, I've never been able to not care if someone likes me or not. Even if it's someone I don't like...go figure! As for feeling inferior or easily intimidated, that's so ingrained into my character, I doubt even a psychiatrist could help me change. It probably stems from growing up poor and Mom's constant warning "don't act like white trash." Consequently, I always felt I was white trash and had to fool people into thinking I wasn't.
As for laughing more, I have always tried to find the humor in any situation. Worrying? I'm a first-class worrier! I could probably give lessons.
If my child was out past curfew, my fingers actually itched to start calling hospitals to find out where he/she was after the horrible accident I could imagine he/she had been in. One night when my daughter was over an hour late, I actually did call the hospitals in Bremen, Mishawaka and South Bend, as well as the police departments.
When my son played football, I had to be at every game. When he got hurt, I had to be there to ride in the ambulance to the hospital! Then of course, the only time he did get hurt and have to go to the hospital, I had to follow the ambulance. And I won't even talk about when both boys went away to college! Its a good thing that we, as human beings, are adaptive. After the first couple of months I did relax and stop waking up in the middle of the night imagining them hurt and bleeding.
From my now lofty age of Seventy, I have learned a few things. Number one, is..we raise our children the best we know how and pray it was good enough. We have to let them go. One of the most memorable sermons Pastor Bob Hueni ever preached, to me, was about how our children belonged to God..we were just caretakers. God had entrusted them to us to raise, train, and guide into adulthood. They were not our possessions. We even had an emotional service where we gave our children over to God..or back to Him, while promising to raise them the way He wanted. Joey was four years old at the time and has belonged to God ever since. I didn't make the same emotional hand-over with Tammy and Buddy. At the time they were teen-agers and had, themselves, given their lives to God.
Another thing I have learned is, to remember yesterday, plan for tomorrow, but to live for today. This is harder than it sounds. To remember yesterday means to not forget the lessons we've learned. To plan for tomorrow means taking care of our families, our homes, cities, states, country. Living for today is the hardest. While living for today, you can't forget yesterday and tomorrow. But you must let the people closest to you know how you feel. A hug, a touch, a loving glance, a wicked wink, ...and a smile across the room...all let that special person...a child, a spouse, a sibling, a parent...know that you love them. Oh, don't forget the words, they're important too...but its the silent actions that warm our hearts. Live for today by being courteous and respectful to other people...more than just a polite Thank you and You're welcome. Say a few words to lift the spirits of the harried sales clerk. Tell the frazzled mother of a toddler what a lovely child she has. Pay the check for the elderly couple in McDonalds counting their pennies. I'm convinced that kindness and consideration are contagious. If you show kindness to someone unexpectedly, more than half of them will pass it on.
I remember once, years ago, in the grocery store I didn't have enough money to pay for all the groceries in my cart. And the utter embarrassment I felt at having to pick through the items deciding what to keep and what to put back. A lady behind me told the clerk to bag all of it and she would pay the difference. I might add that I had no extraneous items. Milk, bread, balogna, hambuger, hotdogs, and a few cans of vegetables. Anything I didn't keep would mean less for me and my two kids to eat that week. So, even while embarrassed and overwhelmed at the generosity, I was extremely grateful. Over the years since then, I have several times, found myself in the shoes of that kind lady..and have followed her example. Just as I'm sure some of the people who I have helped out, have...and will...help others in the same circumstances.
Living for Today. Passing it on. Praising God.
Needless to say, at least one...sometimes all of them...were broken before the end of January. One year, to that list, I added the resolution to read the entire bible again. I say "again" because I had read it through at least twice by the time I was out of high school. I made a plan...to read a chapter every day. I didn't follow that plan, though, often reading several chapters at a sitting. And, by the end of May, I had completed the task. And, was I proud! I told everybody who would listen. I had finally carried out a New Year's Resolution.
The hard ones kept eluding me. The temper was, I thought, the easiest one. But...I forgot to add pouting to the list. So, instead of flaring up and speaking my mind, I became a world-class pouter. The only thing I can say in my defense is...if whoever I was mad at left me alone for awhile...and let me pout...I soon got over it. It has never been part of my make-up to stay mad for very long or to carry a grudge. Once I was over it, it was as ...and is...as if it never happened. I have never been able to understand those people who can keep a grudge...and a mad...going for months, even years.
And, I've never been able to not care if someone likes me or not. Even if it's someone I don't like...go figure! As for feeling inferior or easily intimidated, that's so ingrained into my character, I doubt even a psychiatrist could help me change. It probably stems from growing up poor and Mom's constant warning "don't act like white trash." Consequently, I always felt I was white trash and had to fool people into thinking I wasn't.
As for laughing more, I have always tried to find the humor in any situation. Worrying? I'm a first-class worrier! I could probably give lessons.
If my child was out past curfew, my fingers actually itched to start calling hospitals to find out where he/she was after the horrible accident I could imagine he/she had been in. One night when my daughter was over an hour late, I actually did call the hospitals in Bremen, Mishawaka and South Bend, as well as the police departments.
When my son played football, I had to be at every game. When he got hurt, I had to be there to ride in the ambulance to the hospital! Then of course, the only time he did get hurt and have to go to the hospital, I had to follow the ambulance. And I won't even talk about when both boys went away to college! Its a good thing that we, as human beings, are adaptive. After the first couple of months I did relax and stop waking up in the middle of the night imagining them hurt and bleeding.
From my now lofty age of Seventy, I have learned a few things. Number one, is..we raise our children the best we know how and pray it was good enough. We have to let them go. One of the most memorable sermons Pastor Bob Hueni ever preached, to me, was about how our children belonged to God..we were just caretakers. God had entrusted them to us to raise, train, and guide into adulthood. They were not our possessions. We even had an emotional service where we gave our children over to God..or back to Him, while promising to raise them the way He wanted. Joey was four years old at the time and has belonged to God ever since. I didn't make the same emotional hand-over with Tammy and Buddy. At the time they were teen-agers and had, themselves, given their lives to God.
Another thing I have learned is, to remember yesterday, plan for tomorrow, but to live for today. This is harder than it sounds. To remember yesterday means to not forget the lessons we've learned. To plan for tomorrow means taking care of our families, our homes, cities, states, country. Living for today is the hardest. While living for today, you can't forget yesterday and tomorrow. But you must let the people closest to you know how you feel. A hug, a touch, a loving glance, a wicked wink, ...and a smile across the room...all let that special person...a child, a spouse, a sibling, a parent...know that you love them. Oh, don't forget the words, they're important too...but its the silent actions that warm our hearts. Live for today by being courteous and respectful to other people...more than just a polite Thank you and You're welcome. Say a few words to lift the spirits of the harried sales clerk. Tell the frazzled mother of a toddler what a lovely child she has. Pay the check for the elderly couple in McDonalds counting their pennies. I'm convinced that kindness and consideration are contagious. If you show kindness to someone unexpectedly, more than half of them will pass it on.
I remember once, years ago, in the grocery store I didn't have enough money to pay for all the groceries in my cart. And the utter embarrassment I felt at having to pick through the items deciding what to keep and what to put back. A lady behind me told the clerk to bag all of it and she would pay the difference. I might add that I had no extraneous items. Milk, bread, balogna, hambuger, hotdogs, and a few cans of vegetables. Anything I didn't keep would mean less for me and my two kids to eat that week. So, even while embarrassed and overwhelmed at the generosity, I was extremely grateful. Over the years since then, I have several times, found myself in the shoes of that kind lady..and have followed her example. Just as I'm sure some of the people who I have helped out, have...and will...help others in the same circumstances.
Living for Today. Passing it on. Praising God.
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